longing to lead

i want to be leading. encouraging. to be pushing towards what i know to be truth. something that should come easy. if it's what i carry inside, it should come out easily. but it doesn't.
what do i do? do i abandon this, like a long project that seems to take more work than originally thought? no, that's not what i want. but i don't know how to break through and spark change. treading on this path with light feet and a hopeful heart; i want to see something change. movement towards what's best.
God give me wisdom. God i need you. BE in this situation

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